Tuesday, July 27, 2010

proud nubian princess....

dude....

in this scene: after closing down barts t-shirt stand, chief wiggum asked for an extra extra extra extra extra extra extra large shirt but realized the only one that was available in his size said "proud nubian princess."

prolly should have started the blog off with this....


- cheers... david

Saturday, July 24, 2010

its chinatown...

dude...

k, ive been thinking a little about our chat.... breaking up with me on skype chat, not voice or cam or face to face but on chat..... lame...


i asked you once if you were in love with me, you said yes, you were... i told you that i could be in love with you... big difference... i think maybe you failed to fully grasp that i was never as in love with you.. at least not as much as your were with me, and certainly not now... i wanted to be, i tried to be... i failed to be... i failed, again.. epic fail...


many times you said, out loud, you wanted to care for me, whatever that means... you wanted, apparently, happily ever after, without having to actly be here for the ever after... you really are childish and dramatic and selfish and angry and vindictive.. youre blaming me for your broken heart, for your embarrassment, your foolishness... i really dont care why you chose to end any romantic feelings you had for me, or why you felt that you were flying solo in this relationship... i mean i understand why you felt that way, but i it was enough for me to just move on and be friends... whatever that might have meant or been... thanks for dragging me through your hurt feelings, i really enjoyed that... i hope you feel better.... oh, and thanks for the lecture too... monseigneur... thats it isnt it?

dude..

youre a priest.. k, studying to be, and i cant compete with that... or with jesus, or with your desire to be the savior of the world... i would always be a lesser priority.. jesuit or not, whatever your vocation or activist-deal-of-the-month is, it will always be the true focus of your life for as long as it lasts.. and so too with the next thing, and so on.. whoever loves you will need to realize that and be ok with never being first, only second or maybe third.... the priorities of my life are different, and yeah, you would never be the central focus of it... david is the most important person in davids life... as much as i sometimes try and want not to be... in this respect, we are too much alike to be different enough to be together... its not even about high five.. i was afraid that would be my dagger in your heart... nope.... when we were together i didnt even think about me being high five and you.... well, not...


k, and im a slacker... yup... i have no real goals or any direction in my life... hockey was it for me, and now thats really gone for good... and after 2008-09 its enough right now to just be alive and not living in a cardboard box....


will i try to spend time with you while you are here at the end of july? maybe.. maybe not.. ill prolly just keep my distance and stay as far away from you as possible.... and the rest...


its chinatown dude... its chinatown....

just walk away......


- cheers... david

Saturday, July 17, 2010

gay pride day 2010...


dude...

its gay pride day! finally.. happy gay pride 2010! lots of sunshine and a really great park for the festival... oh yeah, and the pacific ocean breeze... $25 for the festival? wait, what? thats outrageous.... its a vendor fair... with a beer garden... and bad 80s headliners..

devo? really? devo? again? really? no really? prolly still gonna go though.. its gay pride day!

a while back, mads asked me on that formspring thing "what do i like most about being gay?"


heres my answer ....

casual sex.... k, seriously, the great people i have met along the way... the lifetime of experiences past and present that i might not otherwise have had if i were straight... friends that took me under their wings and really helped make my coming out bearable... friends who let me stay with them while i scrambled to find a place of my own, a full time job and safe place to just be gay after my father kicked me out.... friends who cared for me when i first got sick.. if i hadn't been gay, i would never have known, loved and tolly trusted my best friend l.s....


and some more....

i discovered that i was good at sports.. well, a sport... hockey... maybe it was cause i finally felt sort of comfortable in my own skin... i had dropped like 50 lbs and was going to the gym regularly.. bike riding long distances, like 50, 75, 100 mi mixed terrain trips.. even in mexico... [the libre from rosarito to ensenada is beautiful and fucking amazing as it snakes its way south along the unspoiled pacific coast of baja..]

some of my friends at transportation played street hockey after work like two or three days a week... i asked if i could join, and yes... turns out i was good at it... ice hockey too... i love the game, i miss playing it.... i dont think my hockey experiences would have been the same if i had been straight.. prolly better this way... im a team guy but not a superstar.. id wear the "a" before id ever consider wearing the "c"... actly, id prefer to not wear either letter.. im a quiet leader... a team guy now and forever.. occasionally i go a little crazy, who doesnt? did i forget to mention i have a temper?


my first gay pride day was in 1986.. it was a political event more than a giant fag party... but it was getting there.. what a rush, being transgressive as it were, outlaws.. misfits, deviants, unclean... sinners... i was as scared as i was thrilled to be there.. all those freaks n femmes n queers and lesbians too... what if someone recognizes me? they did and it was ok...

i volunteered at the parade a couple of years later... it rained, well sort of... it was hot n humid...

k, not so much....

actup came later.... silence = death... so did queer nation... gay boys make me hard... a refrigerator magnet i still have....


happy 2010 gay pride people.. 60 years since harry hay founded the mattachine society, 41 years after stonewall, and 30 years on from the first know case of hiv/aids in the united states...

ps...

met a really hoy guy from ottawa... oh canada!!!

i love gay pride weekend!


- cheers..... david

Wednesday, July 7, 2010

homophobia in the nhl....

dude...
check out this article i found on the blue and copper report....


k, i didnt read through all the comments... i think the article speaks volumes about where we stand as gay men in amateur sports, especially hockey...

i belonged to a great group of mostly lgbtq people the had in common some personal experience with being closeted and playing sports, especially hockey... that it blew up in our faces points to a real need for the nhl and the nhlpa to cowboy up and make a push for inclusion and tolerance at all levels in the sport i love...

if more of us, especially in amateur sports felt supported and safe, we could significantly change the professional playing field... prolly not tomorrow, or even next week, but change is good and its already happening... that brian burke is an nhl big shot is a great start.. the stanley cup and brent sopel in the chicago gay pride parade, brian burke in the toronto gay pride parade in a leafs jersey, all epic.. brendan, my hero, take a look at what you started... youre magic...

how many of us that quit playing when we were in high school or college out of fear might have gone on to great things in some professional sports capacity.. as players or agents, or whatever.. if not for the perception and often reality that they hate us...
like brendan burke might have.... his coming out was a great beginning... you really are the magic man..

its now time for the nhl, nhlpa, and all the rest to move forward the positive change that brendan began, that brian, patrick, brent and lord stanley continue.... creating a safe place for lgbtq athletes to be full members of the teams we play for in the game we love so much....

- cheers.... david

Friday, July 2, 2010

so, what do you think marge, all i need is a title....

dude..
thinking about changing the name of my blog...
.. so what do you think, marge? all i need is a title. i was thinking along the lines of no tv and no beer make homer something something.. - homer simpson


log on and tell me what you think...
1. keep the name as it is
2. change it, damn it, change it!
3. meh, whats on tv?

possible names im rolling around in my head...

gimme the bat marge

careful with that axe eugene - k, i , ahem, borrowed that one from pink floyd, so maybe not..

unclaimed freight

dead letter office - prolly already taken, damn boomers and their r.e.m. b-sides..

blame canada

here kitty kitty kitty...

two for flinching, five for fighting <------- this one is my fav..

i am a rain god




~ cheers... david